Stuck in a Moment You Can’t Get Out Of…

Ever have those times when you recall a memory of a time or a place or an event, maybe it’s brought on by a song, or a line in a movie, or just by something you overhear in a diner, and that “trigger” leads to a “place” you haven’t visited in awhile. Sometimes it’s a place that you smile fondly at when you remember back to that time – whether it was having ice cream on a summer afternoon with friends, taking a hike up a hill with a pal, or even just having a long chat with a buddy you hadn’t seen in a long time – and in that flash of that particular moment, you feel happy. You let that scene play out in front of you, and are content.

But what about those other times, those few seconds that seem to last an eternity, when you start to think back to an evening or perhaps an encounter where in a mere moment, you said something or did something that changed the course of your future in a most unpleasant way. And, when you are brought back to that spot, to that situation, you replay it over and over again, not because you want to, but because you can’t seem to get it out of your head. Because in that instant you just wish you could go back, and do or say something different, something that will inexplicably “fix” whatever error you made, signal you sent forward, message you conveyed, that messed up the course of that friendship, that relationship, forever.

Anyone else know what I’m talking about?

Don’t Worry, Be Happy

We all do it, at one time or another – we worry. This worry can be over something real or imagined; in front of us or something we create in our minds.

Worry means, according to Webster’s New World Dictionary, to harass or treat roughly with or as with continual biting or tearing with the teeth; to pluck at, push on, touch, etc. repeatedly in a nervous or determined way; to annoy, bother, harass, vex, etc.; to cause to feel troubled or uneasy; make anxious; distress.

I think that last definition: to cause to feel troubled or uneasy; make anxious; distress, really describes my feelings, as of late. I seem to be unable to calm my mind – I am constantly on edge. I know it’s a plethora of troubles – personal and professional – and I know the best thing to do is not worry, but I can’t help it, it’s part of my nature.

I know that worrying doesn’t help anything. Often times it leads us to believe things that aren’t true. For me, my mind is good at coming up with all sorts of false scenarios that I believe must be true. I work myself up into a frenzy and convince myself that this idea, this concept I have created, is real. Then I focus all my energy onto it and hold on tight. It looms over me, lurks around every corner, every crevice of my mind. I get myself all tense and it’s awful. I just can’t relax or “get a grip.” I tend to pace the floor and often times I cry. What’s worse is I tend to talk my friends ears off over and over about the problems I am worrying about and then worry about that as well – that I will alienate them.

But, I am trying to think of ways to ease my stress. I am learning that exercising, being around people who make me smile and laugh, and trying to control the parts of my world, my life, my thinking that I can, I will. And remember, that this too, shall pass.

Anyone else out there worrying about anything? If so, I’d love to hear your remedies for easing that burden.

What Do You Value?

In these tough economical times, with so many people unemployed and those that are employed constantly doing everything they can to keep in that way, everyone seems to be cutting back. People are living with less, or trying to save more and figure out what they can live without.

Restaurants are offering all sorts of deals, at least in my area, to encourage people to eat out. They have "Restaurant Week" where various establishments are offering a choice of an appetizer, a meal and a dessert for $20.09. And there aren't many places where you can go these days and get a three-course meal for that price. So, it's appealing for friends and couples to go out and "splurge."

I know many of my friends and I are looking for ways to be more thrify by engaging in activities such as walking, having a glass of wine at each other's places, or meeting to discuss a book. We are learning that it is not always about going out or spending tons of money in order to have fun. And, truthfully, I think many of us have always felt that way.

When times are tough I think while we feel strain on our purse strings, we look towards what we have control over - growing the bonds of friendship, spending time with our loved ones, taking better care of ourselves. It helps us feel more positive by surrounding ourselves with those who matter most to us.

At least that's the one of the lessons I've taken away during this past year.

Therefore, I pose these thoughts to all of you: What do you value? What can you live without? How are you handling the current recession? Any advice or insights to share?

Try New Things...

Hello and welcome to October! Here in New England the leaves are changing from green to red to yellow and orange. Such beautiful colors and a refreshing new look to the landscape.

As the season changes, as the scenery morphs into something "new" it reminds me that I, too, can mold myself. I'm an everchanging being. We all are.

There's an expression, "Live today like it's your last day." Maybe that's a hard concept to follow all the time, but it's something to think about.Whether it's trying a new drink or teaching a class, don't hesitate to say yes, even if you are uncertain of the results. I didn't know if I would like my pumpkin spice latte but it was delightful. And I haven't taught my class yet, but since a voice that sounded just like myself answered a resounding "YES!" when asked if I would be interested in developing and teaching a class, I realized that I can surprise myself all the time. And while the idea of speaking in front of others makes my palms sweat and my heart beat really fast, I believe that I can do it.

So, here's where I extend my thoughts forward to all of you - what are you going to say yes to this week? Or this month? You might just be excited by the outcome.